Yesterday was a very tiring day.  Work was hectic and traffic was worse.  It took me over an hour to get home which is a daily routine for me.  As I drove I looked up noticing the very gray sky and seeing the small rain drops falling on my windshield. I prepared for traffic to get worse appreciating that in Miami people drive even slower when it rains. I heard the car engines, the horns, saw people on their cells and even saw a few fingers flying in the air.  After about 30 minutes in the car, I looked at the time and realized that I still had about another 20 -30 minutes to go if I was lucky.  Images and thoughts wandered as they often do when I have to sit in the car for a long period of time.  I then silently asked; Dear God, how much longer will I have to do this?

I have been working since I was 15. That’s over 30 years.  I have often wanted to have my own business, or do something different. I’ve always wanted to make a difference.  I will admit that often times I have envied those having the luxury and/or money to stay home and build their dream. I come back to reality desperately Zig-Zaggin all the traffic and rain. “I finally made it” I think to myself  as I walk though my door dropping all my things on the floor. I take my shoes off and head to my room.  I take a long shower, make a quick healthy dinner and begin to finally relax.  I turn on the television and begin watching a documentary called “Lemonade the Movie:” I notice it’s about people who have been laid off and what they have done after getting the “pink slip”.   The tag line for the movie is “It’s not a pink slip, it’s a blank page”.  Filled with curiosity, I watched it and heard the stories of people who have felt devastated by the fact that they now have no pay check.  I then began to think about the question I asked God in the car… “How much longer?” I didn’t have an answer.  I wondered; does God have the answer? Does destiny?  All I really knew was that today my spouse and I have to work. We must pay the bills, the doctors, the schools, and the IRS.  If we don’t’ work what will happen? Who will be become? What will we become?    I also knew another thing though, I knew that we both had dreams and have often worked hard to make them happen; still we are overwhelmed by life and the responsibilities we must meet and the reality of our daily habitual work life.

I continued watching the movie and after it was over my spouse and I just turned our heads to each other without saying a word. I know it was something that wedged in him as well as me.  It made so much of an impact that I wanted to write about it and to take a moment to tell everyone that has recently been laid off to just DO IT!  If you’ve always had a dream, or wanted to do something, now is the time.  Don’t sit moping wondering where the next check will come from.  Don’t feel sorry for yourself, because as long as you have the will you can have the power.  It’s a blank page.  Take advantage of your time and fill it up!

How many motivational books, quotes, videos, have you come across?  Most of us are so fed up by the troubles of life that we will try anything we can to change things in our lives.   Is it true that the power of positive thinking can help us find happiness?  It’s no secret that the teachings of the law of attraction have been widely spread. No one can say it’s a bad thing, although some question it. A lot of us will try it because as human beings we have the genuine need to be happy and fulfilled.  Many of the motivational gurus will account much of their own stories of emotional survival, and many will want to teach us how we can to do it ourselves.  We are so desperate to find answers on “how to” that we will follow any sort of instruction, put it to practice and hope for life to change right in from of our eyes.

People in control of their lives will say over and over that it’s up to you and that you have the power to change anything you want. But how do you start using this power when you don’t even have the strength to wake up in the morning. You hear the experts on television, you see the commercials, and you may even spend the last few dollars you have to buy the book, the CD or go to the conference.  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with finding ways of getting motivated, hell;  I try it all the time and I also share it all the time. I am living proof that you can make it through pretty much anything.

Desolation!  I’ve lived it and have surpassed it; I now want to others to do the same.  There are many motivational speakers, coaches, mentors that may take advantage and sell their life changing ideas to those in need. It’s no secret that when you’re really hungry…you’ll eat anything.  Many of what you hear and many of the things being practiced and taught by life gurus are not new.  Even many popular books will point out that they’ve existed for centuries.  It’s nothing new folks!   Ask yourself this.. Do I have survival instincts?   When I ask this I don’t mean, what you would do in a moment of physical threat.  I mean; can you survive emotional threat.  We can’t see emotional harm, so we tend to allow it in easily and live in us. Suddenly we are feeling like crap, blaming God, people, and even ourselves for being so stupid and giving people permission to hurt us. Sometimes admitting fault is so hard that we live in denial daily.  We then work hard in finding justifications for negative treatments and our giving consent to those that are harming our essence. We hurt, become confused, feel empty and find no answer.

Then someone sends us some YouTube motivational video, or a name of a great book.  We hear and read what we already know but never put into practice.  Don’t get me wrong, the books are great, I myself have many. The seminars are fantastic and I go as often as I can; and as far as YouTube… I love it!

But when we are hurting and we want things to change in our lives; there must come a time when you ask… “How bad do I want it?” How bad do you want your life to change?  I’ve got news for you… It won’t, unless you do it yourself!  Stop the pity party and wake up.  As for me, I loved my party.  It was mine and feeling sorry for myself meant others could maybe have some sort of sympathy for me.  Yes I was in control but it was the wrong kind.  Feeling sorry for myself meant one thing.. At least I feel something.  Then I realized it was really not a good way to constantly be feeling.   I had to do something; so I began to look at myself and ask… “Do you REALLY want your life to change?”  I accepted that I had valid reasons for feeling so bad.  My first step was admitting there is nothing wrong with feeling sad.  I had lived through some pretty rough times and many people have taken a lot from me and my spirit.  Many people have hurt me.   The second step was realizing that I had and owned the power to change it.  Own…own…own… You own your power.   Then came the question; how do I want to live my life and can I use this power to make it happen.  The choices we make have plenty to do with the happiness in our lives.  We tend to put up with bad relationships because we would rather do that than be alone.  Are we happy?  No, but at least we’re not alone.

Get yourself out of that pothole. Believe in you and that being WITH you can be a truly wonderful experience. Trust in the strength you have.  Don’t underestimate the decisions you can make once you have taken yourself out of the pothole.  The first question however, is “Do I Really Want To” Being sad, and feeling helpless tends to give us more attention. We’ll get the pat on back, a hug; have friends and family worry about us.  So, in turn we feel that others care and at least have that.  If we are strong and fearless the chance is no one will give us that hug, no one will pay attention to our needs because they will think we have none.  It’s not that way at all.  As a matter of fact, I love that I can be strong and show others that strength.  I love writing but never did it for others to enjoy and learn.  I did it for my comfort and shame on me for that. Today I love expressing myself with my words on paper, I love the reactions from people, and I love voicing my strength. I love finding ways to be happy even if it’s by simply walking in the park.  I have no money but I have so much more.  I find the beauty in others and know for a fact that people can be so very beautiful!  Don’t give up on yourself.  Don’t give up on your dreams even when they have to rest for a while.  Don’t give up on you… even when others have.  I didn’t make it this far to give up.
I did after all…make it this far!   If you believe it; you can become it.